1. It means ‘Shadowhunters: Looking Better in Black Than the Widows of our Enemies Since 1234
2. Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt.
3. A diary with no drawings of me in it? Where are the torrid fantasies? The romance covers?
4. It’s fascinating. You know all these words, and they’re all English, but when you string them together into sentences, they just don’t make any sense.
5. I don’t do what I’m told, but I might do what you want if you ask me nicely.
6. Oh, and I suppose the apples ate the cheese.
7. This is what happened in love. One of you cried a lot and then both of you grew sarcastic.
8. I’m sorry. I use my rapier wit to hide my inner pain.
9. Ask me no questions, and I’ll tell you no fibs.
10. It’s now very common to hear people say, ‘I’m rather offended by that.’ As if that gives them certain rights. It’s actually nothing more… than a whine. ‘I find that offensive.’ It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. ‘I am offended by that.’ Well, so fucking what.
11. While the Clave disapproves of trespassers, oddly they take an even darker view of beheading and skinning people. They’re peculiar that way.
12. What was up with class today? It was watered-down porn. He practically had you and Patch on top of your lab table, horizontal, minus your clothes, doing the Big Deed.
13. Awww,” Minho said. “That’s almost as sweet as that time she slammed the end of a spear into your shuck face.
14. I can be quite sarcastic when I’m in the mood.
15. Yet, I didn’t understand that she was intentionally disguising her feelings with sarcasm; that was usually the last resort of people who are timid and chaste of heart, whose souls have been coarsely and impudently invaded; and who, until the last moment, refuse to yield out of pride and are afraid to express their own feelings to you.
16. It’s wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.
17. I don’t profess any religion; I don’t think it’s possible that there is a God; I have the greatest difficulty in understanding what is meant by the words ‘spiritual’ or ‘spirituality.
18. The more this guy talked, the more he sounded like a fortune cookie.
19. I cannot speak well enough to be unintelligible.
20. Well, someone slap my butt and give me a hero cookie.
21. If you are going to do that, would you mind not jostling the bed so much?’ came a sarcastic voice near the head board. ‘Perhaps you could roll around on the floor.
32. If you say ‘we’re in this together,’ I’m going to hurl.
33. That’s the difference between irony and sarcasm. Irony can be spontaneous, while sarcasm requires volition. You have to create sarcasm.
34. How ’bout a shot of truth in that denial cocktail.
35. High School. Society’s bright idea to put all their aggressive, naive youth into one environment to torment and emotionally scar each other for life.
36. Will suspected Jem was in fact cleverer than he was himself – but he lacked Will’s tendency to assume the absolute worst about people and proceed from there.
37. I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic.
38. Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse.
39. Yes, we’ll yell, ‘Help, help us, goose girl, and bring the terrifying legion of warrior geese’.
40. Enormous? Did you just call me FAT? I am not fat.
41. You did not just say that. I have a feeling we’re on the verge of hugging and coming up with cute nicknames for each other.
42. The bastard kissed her. She was so mad, she bit him hard enough to draw blood. Raphael pulled back, lip already beginning to swell. “We are no longer even, Elena. You’re now in debt.
43. She was heartily ashamed of her ignorance – a misplaced shame. Where people wish to attach, they should always be ignorant. To come with a well−informed mind is to come with an inability of administering to the vanity of others, which a sensible person would always wish to avoid. A woman especially, if she have the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can.
44. I don’t know about your true form, but the weight of your ego sure is pushing the crust of the earth toward the breaking point.
45. I wasn’t entirely sure, but a polite John Pritkin might be a sign of the apocalypse.
46. Yeah you can have a word,” said Harry savagely. “Good-bye.
47. If money’s the god people worship, I’d rather go worship the devil instead.
48. Listen, Peaches, trickery is what humans are all about,” said the voice of Maurice. “They’re so keen on tricking one another all the time that they elect governments to do it for them.
49. There should be a rule against your own inner monologue throwing around that much sarcasm.
50. Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.
51. I am often thought of as being remarkably bright, and yet my brains, more often than not, are busily devising new and interesting ways of bringing my enemies to sudden, gagging, writhing, agonizing death.
52. Dear Karma, I really hate you right now, you made your point.
53. Thomas was an annoying wiseass who tended to make everyone he met want to kill him, and when I have that much in common with someone, I can’t help but like him a little.
54. Sarcasm will make your tits fall off.
55. One day I’ll work out what it is you are saying, my lad, and then you’ll be in trouble.
56. Clever is when one is crafty enough to mistake your imagination for intelligence. Smart is when one assumes they are too educated to notice the difference.
57. Sarcasm creates a chasm between yourself and others.
58. Vampires were always either trying to kill me, or own me. God I hated being popular.
59. Thinking I’m a moron gives people something to feel smug about,” Charles Wallace said. “Why should I disillusion them?
60. Minho snickered and leaned back in his chair. “Man, you are one butt-load of sunshine, let me tell you.